omg so I'm sitting on the bus and a girl gets in and sits down behind me. she's on her cellphone obviously talking to some guy. She's asking when they're getting back together, and when he's going to be done with the girl he's seeing now. She asks if he's using protection with the woman he's seeing now, and he asks why or something I guess because she's like "because I don't want you having kids with anyone but me!" and then she's saying "so she has an IUD? that's good." and then she's offering to buy him condoms and making plans to meet up and it was just the saddest fucking thing I've witnessed in a long time.

I wanted to turn around and tell her... something. like "run" or "there's no way this ends well for you" because I've been that dumbfuck girl begging for scraps from some asshole guy, and I know there's no happy ending there, even if she gets him in the end, what are the chances they'll be happy with that dynamic?? just, ugh.  but of course I didn't say anything, because well she's a damn stranger. then when I got off the bus I could see her touching up her makeup and that just made it even sadder because obviously she wants to look good for this guy. ugh it was just depressing.


Today I learned my neighbor believes that vaccinations cause autism, and is WAY crazier than I thought. He saw this one pastor's wife that rides the bus and wanted to talk to her. He's Catholic(or was), and she's.. I forgot... Lutheran?? Presbyterian? and last time I saw her on the bus, he was asking her questions about differences in their religion. I think he was having a crisis of faith or something. She was pretty patient with him even though he was talking in circles.

Anyway so today he saw her and sat down across from her, and asked what she thought about vaccinations. She was like "...?" And he started saying "blah blah autism"... and she tried telling him that vaccinations have saved a lot of people, and that people with autism can still lead good lives(she clearly didn't believe that vaccinations actually cause autism).. and he was like "Are you saying autism is a good thing?!"

He said that Bill Gates was infiltrated by the devil, and that he's trying to give people in India polio, and he has his sights set on killing all the kids in Africa. And he started saying we should be worried, especially with Obamacare. Huh??

Then she tried placating him by saying something about Jesus being our protector. And then he started going ON and ON about abortion, and how there's 50 million abortions performed every year... and how there's some law in the senate to kill babies that are up to age 3. And then the woman started questioning his sources.

Then he started going on about nephilim and giants being created with DNA(?) And that he said kids are being taught to masturbate in school at ages 4 and 5. And he said "do you believe that?" and she said "no, I don't believe that, I have a 5 year old, and she's not learning to masturbate." so deadpan I almost started laughing... then he started implying she was ignorant... and that she didn't know what was REALLY going on, since she can't be with her kid 24/7.

I kept wanting to yell at him to leave the woman alone, but I'm a big fat chicken.

He went on about a bunch of crap for a while, then started talking about the government spraying chemicals in the air specifically to kill us... and that the Colorado theater shooting was a conspiracy to take our guns, and that it was STAGED.

Then he started talking about the upcoming apocalypse, and someone behind him agreed with him and the second he turned his head, she started reading the book she had with her, that she'd been reading when we got on the bus, probably hoping he'd like get the hint... which he didn't. Then he started talking about the apocalypse for a few more moments, and she said "I'm going to finish my book now, but good talk." and set herself free. This entire conversation was over the course of like 25 minutes. Then he started chatting with one of his other buddies behind him about other random shit...

At that point I went to finally put my headphones on like I usually do, and discovered they weren't there. I left them at home -_- I almost started crying. But he was mostly done talking at that point.

PS Apparently my neighbor recommends a site called INFOWARS, but I haven't given it a read.

Bad Omen

A few months ago, my mom gave me a fortune cookie in a wrapper. It was empty. My mom said "Huh. It must mean your future is wide open!" Yeah right, mom.

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My cat, Misa, went outside one day two years ago and just never came home. She was only like a year and a half old, and yet I was so attached to her. Hell, I still miss her. There's this little toy that Misa loved. It started out as one of those dingly bells attached to a fluffy mouse looking thing, attached to a string, attached to a black stick. But, after months of wear and tear, the stick and half the string ended up gone. But she still LOVED that thing. If I wanted to find her all I had to do was jingle that bell. In fact when I was looking for her, I brought it with me hoping she'd hear it. I used to put it somewhere when I was sleeping, because it was hard to sleep when she was playing with it at all hours. The last time I put it away, it was under the cushion of a living room chair. It's still there now. Every time I think about throwing it away, or even just giving it to one of the other cats to play with, I get so upset.

Well, I've gotten that out. Cheers.

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I think some time it might be fun to go to a store and purchase all the kinds of things that people get embarrassed about buying at the same time and watch the cashier's reaction. So like tampons, preparation h, adult diapers, yeast infection medicine, condoms, lube... and then some teen magazines.

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So there's actually an upside to running out of my mood stabilizers. I have more good moods. I mean they're fleeting and are often followed by a crash, and I get agitated easier...but like I said. I have more good moods mixed in with the Meh's and the UUUUAUGHAKEGHKAEGALG's.
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