| ~*The Dreaded Biological Clock*~ |
[08 Apr 2008|11:46pm] |
So, I ran into a girl I was friends with, but had sort of lost touch with over a year ago... and she was about seven months pregnant... after a few minutes of chatting, I discovered nearly every girl I was friends with in middle school is currently 6+ months pregnant. FOUR different pregnancies...and for most of them, it's the second baby. I'm not sure that any of them are married, or that they even have "active" fathers in the soon-to-be-born's life, but still. Then there's me: unemployed, still single, incredibly reclusive, and not even in school...and now I'm bummed because I don't have a baby. :( I mean I can't have a baby seeing as I'm unemployed and single AND live with my mom & brother... I don't know... I just suddenly feel extremely "un-grown up" and behind in the adulthood thing.
Maybe I'm just a super-slow starter and in 5 years I will have some sort of fabulous life, as some sort of successful career type, or weird housemom or something. I mean probably not. I don't even know which I'd prefer.
Well whatever. I'm just having some sort of "where am I going, why is everyone having babies and not me" sort of day here. I'll get over it.
x-posted on blogger. VERBALLY x-posted everywhere
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| ...This is sort of gross. |
[14 Mar 2008|02:19am] |
Oh my god.
I just drank an medium-sized glass of water.
When I finished, I looked in the cup and there was a dead fruit fly in it.
...I drank an entire glass of water with a fruit fly in the cup.
then I spent about a minute trying not to throw up on myself.
... Seriously, it really freaked me out.
...I guess I should be glad I didn't find it stuck to my teeth.
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| oh heeeell no. |
[12 Mar 2008|04:36am] |
I just found out Death Cab for Cutie is coming to my city next month. >_< and I totally missed my chance to get a ticket because they're sold out.
A quasi-relevant band that I actually like is coming to my city and I missed my chance to get a ticket!
:( BOOO.
Oh well ... I still have Henry Rollins this month...
In other "news" I started to wonder what my other quasi-emo quasi-acoustic favorite "Dashboard Confessional" was up to... so I wiki'd them.. and they just announced yesterday that they were making a new album.
I just think it's weird because if I'd looked 2 days ago that information wouldn't have been there.
...Is this interesting enough to be posting about?
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[08 Mar 2008|02:58am] |
LOL. Boondock Saints is on Spike TV right now... but of course they have to censor all the "fuck"s out... which is like...half the movie's dialog.
I'll have to remember to watch it on the 17th. w00t.
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| i can be fat on meez :3 |
[07 Feb 2008|06:29am] |
 
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[01 Feb 2008|07:25am] |
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| I guess I'm a sicko too!! |
[11 Nov 2007|06:38am] |
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Arrrgh I did it again! After reading all that mydeathspace stuff I googled suicide notes...which led to an article on Wikipedia about a politician who shot himself on camera, which led to me viewing the wikipedia list of filmed deaths, which led me to some website with horrifyingly gross photos in the style of Ogrish... so now I have all these horrible images in my head of people who were hung, and murdered bloody people, and the barely recognizable bodies of tsunami victims in my head!! >.>' so now I'm looking at photos of kittens on deviant art.
This isnt even the first time I've had to look at photos of kittens to try and erase some sort of binge-internetting involving horrific photos.
On the plus side... reading all those suicide notes had made me a little depressed and suicide-minded.... but the photos made me much less inclined to die any time soon. (although I guess if I was going to commit suicide I wouldnt somehow beat myself to death or drown horribly, but still. dead bad. kittens good.)
The amazing part is, I was looking at all that on a full stomach and having little reaction, but earlier I tried to plunge the clogged toilet on an empty stomach and almost made a barfy.
God I hope I dont have nightmares tonight about kittens murdering prostitutes and then drowning in a tsunami and being found many decayfilled days later.
Someone console me.
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[11 Nov 2007|04:44am] |
Glah. I have got to stop flittering over to mydeathspace.com... or whatever it used to be called on livejournal... I'll randomly go to the site like...once or twice a year and spend a couple hours reading about all these people that recently died, and seeing if they posted any ironic last thoughts, or intentional last thoughts in the case of suicide... One was awful.... a man who had battled depression gave in and commited suicide, leaving a final blog post on his myspace... and people who didnt know him were responding to the post days after his death saying all manner of thoughtless things... even knowing that the man's family routinely checked the page.
People are so disgusting. Especially people on the internet. I think our generation will utterly go down as the the most unkind in history. That's right. Some of them sicken me more than Nazis.
Think about that next time you want to be an asshole, people. Think "wait, do I want to be worse than a Nazi?"
Ok maybe that's a stretch :P
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| Bullllshit. |
[28 Jul 2007|04:09am] |
Ok... so two rival news helicopters crashed while filming a car chase.
Police are saying the suspect will likely be held responsible.
WTF?
How is pilot negligence the fault of the suspect!?
CNN Article
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| NOOOOOOOOO!!!! |
[21 May 2007|03:23am] |
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The CW cancelled Veronica Mars! >___
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[16 May 2007|04:44am] |
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So there's all this random stuff that's happened or NOT happened in the past two months that I would usually go and call and whine or brag to my best friend about...
Except I don't have one anymore. The last I heard from her was that I was unsupportive, and that I talked down to her and her boyfriend... and that she wasn't going to come to one of our weekly hang-out thingies because she wanted to think things over.
That was over a month ago and I haven't heard from her since.
I have some abandonment issues and all, and a low opinion of myself... and I have been telling her that I feel like we don't have much in common anymore... But I didn't think she would just cut me out. Without telling me.
So of all the girls I was friends with in my teen years (H, B, M, S, C) ... I'm now not friends with any of them. I guess there are two that I really miss...one that I randomly get teary about every other day.
I only have three friends now. They're all guys... (geeky guys! uwahahaha) ... only one of them do I see regularly...
It's just kind of sad that I've drifted apart from all those people... and the ones that I didn't drift from actually got sick of me. Lovely.
It's my fault though. With H & M, we were never really that close or anything, nor did we have some big falling out, we just sort of grew up and didn't talk anymore. With C, I felt like... she changed too much or something because of a guy I have a lot of trouble liking, and when you worship a guy, and your friend doesn't like him... well... the friend becomes less important sometimes. (Well in this case. None of my friends like the guy I make a habit of worshipping, but since he and I aren't dating, there was never any need to choose) ... With B, well. . . we were an inseparable duo that broke up when we both acted like attention-starved ho's over an older geeky fella. Ahhh that old story. With S, well. I'm unsupportive and talk down I guess. ...also I kept joking that I should be best friends with B again since she was more in my boat when it came to not being to thrilled with her current situation. I think I was hoping S would get jealous and stop focusing all her energy on her boyfriend.
At first it was neat that she was finally happy... but then she started being kinda different from the girl I knew and loved. We were so alike before... o.o chubby, lonely, obsessive... But it didn't seem as bad when you had a friend that was the same way... :\ She wanted to lose weight for him, and so one staple of our friendship, junkfood!! (yes it was a staple, yes it's lame) was gone... and then she started doing all this stuff she said she was against... like... trying different drugs (no, not crack or heroin)... wearing thongs (O.o; why does that bother me!?) ... talking about having kids... spending alot of time talking about the guy she was seeing... || and suddenly the friend I was used to had melted away... she had a boyfriend living with her... but she wanted him to come with her whenever she came to hang out... and wanted to get back to him whenever he didn't come with... something we used to hate seeing other people do... c.c' hence my rather insensitive jokes about needing a new best friend... I did apologize when she said it was hurting her feelings though...
...>_< Women.
I haven't dealt with losing her as a friend too well... I've been eating alot of junk food ... something I'd been doing alot less to keep up with her own progress in weight loss... I did the stupid cutting thing a couple of times... and like I mentioned before... I sporadically start to tear up...
But it's fine. I shouldn't be friends with someone that doesn't like me. What's the point? She told me that I was just her friend because she was there, not because of who she was(a concept that is still sort of confusing me)... which I'm starting to think was a projection of HER feelings and not mine... maybe she was friends with me because I was there...and now that she had a boyfriend to connect with... my personality quirks/flaws weren't worth dealing with anymore.
This sucks. I really hate me sometimes. ...and people. I hate people too. grrr.
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[26 Mar 2007|11:32pm] |
Ok... so I've been seeing these commercials for the Spiderman 3 trailer which is airing on Comcast OnDemand.
...Seriously...? We're advertising advertisements now?? We're showing commercials FOR a commercial???
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[11 Mar 2007|05:31am] |
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Joss Stone with vampire red + black hair = SEXY!!!
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[05 Mar 2007|05:36am] |
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:( There's a new Sims 2 expansion pack out... it sounds AWESOME... but is it out for Mac? noooo of course not. :( I can't even BUY it if I were so inclined...
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